Homeschool Mom Learns, Too And Perfectionism gets an F!

Homeschool has significantly more benefits than just educating your child.  In fact, I think I'm the one personally benefiting from the experience the most. Who knew?  God always has a way of humbling this foolish mother of four-the Lord knows, I need it!

  As  I graded my son's daily work today, I noticed small improvements.  My heart sung as I praised God for seeing some fruit of my labor begin to pay off-finally! I could almost hear the angels sing with me.  Although, the answers were not all correct, I noticed a great effort being put forth by him. This alone made me beam with joy.  It felt like a long time in waiting!

  So, as any stressed -craved  homeschool mom would do, I took my moment of victory in awhile  as I drank my coffee and celebrated by  shoving  down my second  piece of dark chocolate with delight--life was good! Maybe I wasn't such a bad teacher after all.

  Then, God began to speak to me.  He made me realize that I needed to celebrate the small victories more  often ( I wonder if that means more chocolate, too?).  He went on to say  that there were a ton more of those moments available to me if I looked for them.   Huh--what did HE mean?  He was telling me to change my perspective.  What? Who me, Lord?-lol!!
You see, I'm a perfectionist-guilty as charged!  Unfortunately, perfectionism is not something that rids itself over night. It's kinda like that fat bulge around my waisteline--it likes to stick to me like glue! But God has been faithful over the years to deliver me from this maddening state little by little.  In fact, it makes me wonder where I ever picked it up from to begin with.   Today, God impressed something on me that I guess at my old ripe age of 40(which btw is the new 21...just saying!) that I'm just now getting.  It's not about the end result, it's about the process that matters most--duh!! This is where the true victory lays!

  You see today, Justin did not do his work without mistakes, but rather I saw a significant improvement in his efforts and this is what I was thrilled with the mostt.  His own attitude towards working out his weaknesses were being improved.  I was able to celebrate that alone and before today, I had failed to.

   In times past, all that mattered the most to me was the right answers. I was so fixated on that, that I failed to see so much more.  I was missing the point to homeschooling altogether or maybe  even life for that matter.  How sad, huh? I know what some of you may be thinking, "Get a life already, Kimchi, what's the big deal here?"   Had I just grown up all of s sudden in this one moment and become  "mommy" mature without realizing it? No, I doubt it. Maybe it was that second piece of dark chocolate that did it for me!-lol... This was huge for me as God continues to set me free from my wrong thinking . Am I like this all the time? No, but more times than I would like to admit:(  What's worse is that I think I preach  on this very thing all the time.  However, you know how that goes, sometimes you are the one eating your own words in the end.  Makes me cringe now just thinking about how I'm always trying to tell people how  the servant,Joshua, of the bible  did not conquer the promise land in one day but rather one victory at a time and that true possession is a daily thing- blah, blah, blah...Anyways, had I become a bridezilla?  Yes,  I was looking at the wrong things and not on God's abounding  grace and love.  Forgive me, Lord! God's grace is sufficient and homeschooling all of a sudden feels like a freer world. Thank you, Lord for the reminder today!!

  So, in the end, homeschool is not just about the child receiving the education, but rather everyone involved being processed with God's love and mercies daily.   It's not about the grades, but rather the relationships being formed and the life lessons being given out daily.   I don't have to look for perfection anymore or even  demand it,  much less talk about it.  Instead, I can enjoy the process, celebrate the small victories and look forward to the bigger ones ahead because God is in the process!!!   You must be willing to be processed.   I think I just received an A for hearing God on this lesson.  Maybe I'll celebrate with another one of those magic chocolates-lol! Or better yet,  I will just go give my son a hug and tell him what a great job he did and that his old mom just passed a pop quiz on grace!  Be encouraged homeschool moms, God's got this...

  Are you suffering from wrong thinking today?  Do you need to slow down and embrace the process of your own life? Does your perspective need to be shifted towards God's view on things? If so, no worries because God is in the business of processing you through without delaying your victories. You can trust Him right now because He sees your end from your beginning and He isn't in the business of handing out F's only A's on His grade book.  As one friend wrote today, "You are not defined by your parenting mistakes, only by God's truth!" So, be set free today and go get that A!